Doubt is the Killer of Dreams.
Recently, I met up at Starbucks with a very talented make-up artist and an amazing stylist to discuss throwing a boudoir marathon. I love everything about shooting boudoir, the hair, the make-up, the pouring of the mimosa, the pumping music, the lingerie, posing my girls, to editing the photos, the whole experience is AMAZING. The girls and I decided to team up and run a marathon this coming November. I designed an exclusive package, and last Thursday I announced it to my email subscribers, and Friday I started to advertise on my social media.
On Friday, I felt so proud of myself. I had spent hours creating advertisements for social media. I loved them and felt so happy with how they turned out. Right away I received some inquiries for the sessions. I wrote them back and sent them all the information in regard to the shoot. I was so freaking excited, literally vibrating with happiness. But by 4pm Friday afternoon, when I hadn’t heard back I began to panic. I had yet to hear from any of the girls I sent the information to earlier that day. I started questioning myself as a boudoir photographer and doubting whether or not anyone would want to book with me. WHAT THE F@$&! I went from feeling so good and excited about the marathon, to completely giving up on myself in less than 8 hours. How does this happen? I got thinking, why amongst all the good, do we choose to fixate on the one thing that might not be going as planned?
This has been spinning in my head all weekend. How many times I have given up on something because it didn’t work out the first time or exactly how I planned it to? As a recovering people pleaser and control freak, I am trying to learn to surrender as much as possible and focus on what I do have control over. I am not alone here. I’ve heard it from many women. “I give up it didn’t work” - after trying a work out plan for one week. “Forget it! No one will hire me” – after applying for one job and not getting it. Why are we doing this to ourselves? Why are we quitting on our goals and dreams after one, two or three tries?
Oprah’s first boss told her that she was too emotional and not right for television. What if she had quit after her boss told her that? Imagine if she just gave up on herself? In 2011, Oprah was the best-paid female in entertainment! I guess it’s a good thing she believed in herself enough to keep going, or she would have never been the richest self-made woman and only black female billionaire.
Walt Disney at age 22 was fired from the Missouri newspaper for “not being creative enough.” The amazing WALT DISNEY! He then went on to create Mickey and Minnie Mouse and was nominated for 59 Academy Awards , winning 32, for his animations. Imagine if after being fired for not being creative enough, he would have quit. Take that in for a moment….
I woke up this morning, had a cup of coffee and I began to wonder if it was time for me to pull the plug on this boudoir marathon. After 2 days of advertising on my own social media feed, I was willing to give up on something that I love and believe in so much. The one thing that LIGHTS MY SOUL ON FIRE, the job I have that makes a lasting impact on women. I was aware of how ridiculous I was acting, so I pulled out my journal to write it out. When I opened up my journal I saw a quote that I had written out the day before, “Doubt is the Killer of dreams. When you challenge yourself daily to take on your fears you’ll see them disappear. Conquer your biggest fears and your dreams will appear.” ~ Lewis Howes.
It hit me. How dare I just give up on myself like that? I am going to make a list of what is in my circle of control. The things that I can do to help promote this special boudoir marathon. I am going to believe fully that this marathon will be a go and give it my all. And if for some reason it doesn’t fill, that is not the end of boudoir marathons, I will simply pick a new day and move on. I have been so blessed to work with so many fabulous women. I am lucky enough to have a shoot next Sunday with a boudoir babe, then four more on November 17. I would say I am pretty darn blessed!!! It helps to sit and look at all the positive going on instead of focusing and dwelling on the what ifs?
I started a fresh page in my journal, wrote down the date and titled todays entry: I REFUSE TO GIVE UP. I started to write: What would the best version of myself do to help book the boudoir marathon?
· Create some ads for social media.
· Do an Instagram live this week to talk about how amazing this session is going to be.
· Print some posters and hang them.
· Ask the girls you are teaming up with to post to their social media about the event.
· Sponsor some ads on Instagram and Facebook to spread the word.
· The list of ideas continued……
As I began coming up with some creative solutions to booking some new clients, I began to relax, and I didn’t feel so wound up. I realized that I have not made a big enough attempt at success to give up on this yet.
It is so easy for us to give up on something that we love before it has even started yet.
Well, here is the truth! You aren’t failing if you give up, that’s just called giving up. You are failing if you don’t push yourself and exhaust all options to make that dream a reality. There is success and VALUABLE lessons on the other side of failure. If November 25 comes and I can honestly say I gave it my all and exhausted all options and my marathon still doesn’t book, then I didn’t fail, I learnt what works and what doesn’t for the next round. There is no greater teacher than failure. I have been in the presence of failure many times before, and thanks to failure, I am running a successful photography business and a weekly blog that is connecting me with women from all over. I am truly grateful for failure.
What are some things that you love that you gave up on? Open up your journal or open up the notes section in your phone and try this: What would the best version of yourself do to help make my dream a reality? Then write down every idea that comes to mind to make that vision come true. Then surrender. Don’t try to control it. Trust fully that god/the universe/higher power, whatever it is that you believe in, is guiding you. If what you desire doesn’t come true for you yet, then know that it wasn’t meant to be this time around and try again. Be consistent in the action of your dreams, do not give up on yourself that easy. You are so worthy of your highest potential. Take one small action on your goal today. Then bit by bit, one small step at a time, you will be amazed how quickly you can make your dreams a reality.
Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for reading this blog. It means more to me that you will ever know. Please feel free to share this blog with anyone who you think might resonate with it. I would be so grateful if you would hit subscribe on my website Angieleah.com. Subscribers receive the weekly blog directly into their inbox and subscribers get access to all of my photography specials. These photography specials are not offered to anyone else.
I hope you all have a fabulous week.
XO,
Angie